I was sitting at the dining room table, yesterday, coloring with Iliya and Max. Well, truthfully, I was sorting through papers while the boys were coloring (and according to Iliya, he’s really the only one who was coloring, since Max still just ‘scribble scrabbles.’).
Anyway, I was pretty absorbed in my paper sorting, and when I realized that Max was jabbering about something, I started to pay closer attention to what he was saying. Although much of what he says sounds like a foreign language, he was definitely saying recognizable English words…and…I was pretty impressed, because we haven’t done any direct instruction time – apparently just talking all the time really pays off! :)
Of course, I wasn’t quick enough with the video camera, so we had to do the best “redo” that we could. Lest I ruin it for you, go ahead and watch!
It doesn’t look like much, but it is so delicious…fresh, healthy, without any additives or unhealthy oils to ruin its quality.
I found it quite by accident. My mother-in-law made something similar to this by accidentally combining 2 recipes, and then I went a step beyond the accidental and purposefully combined 2 recipes, tweaking a bit, and keeping up with my measurements and all (you know, just in case we ended up liking it) and I ended up with the most delicious vinaigrette. So you can see how the “liking it” part turned out, right?
I’ve never been much of a vinaigrette fan, but I am, now!
Toss this with some greens, fruit, nuts, and whatever else you enjoy on your salad.
What are you waiting on? Go! Make some of the world’s best salad dressing and be prepared to get hooked on it. In case you can’t read my chicken scratch above, I’ve typed it out for you.
Most Delicious Vinaigrette…Ever
1/4 c. apple cider vinegar
1 Tbsp. dijon mustard (yes, it looks like it says 2 Tbsp above…and it did, at first, but I started with 1 and ended up thinking 2 might be too much, so 1 Tbsp it is!)
2 Tbsp. honey
1/4 c. olive oil
juice of 1 lemon
juice of 1 lime
Pour all ingredients in a small jar. Put the lid on the jar and shake vigorously. Or, whisk it all together, whatever your preference…just get the ingredients mixed really well.
Kathy -Hi, I was reading your posts and our son also adopted from Russia does the same exact things when he is frustrated when things are not perfect. It started about age 6-7. He is 9 now. He told us its because he sees it a certain way in his mind and gets mad when it does not turn right on paper. He is starting to work thru it better and has a great teacher at school which has been a godsend! he can now talk about it much more and the episodes are less but we are still working thru it! Good luck and the dressing looks great. Kathy
May 18, 2012 - 8:31 am
Joy Paulsen-I make this one too except I add a little fresh garlic. Yummm!
Joy
One year ago, we walked into the baby home and picked Max up for good. He was a scrawny little spider monkey who was so unsure about us that he spent the majority of a few days doing little besides crying. He could hardly sit up, had a hard time finding his appetite, and didn’t care to be touched. He was 18 months old and the size/developmental level of a 9 month old.
Today, it’s hard to remember how life was before that day a year ago…Max has filled out, grown taller, and mostly caught up, developmentally. He loves to be held and hugged, and he eats (bananas and apples) like nobody’s business. My favorite thing is when I’ve been gone for a little bit, and walk through the door, his face lights up and shouts, “Mommmmmyyyyyyyy! Mommmmmmyyyyyyy! MOMMMYYY!” and runs over for a hug.
Here are a couple short clips from both May 2011 and May 2012.
Stacy-It always amazes me how much our little people progress in such a short time. I wish it was this type of progress that got reported openly on the media so more people would realize the potential for the children. . .and for us, the parents. Ah, but God doesn’t work that way, does he?? Hapyy one year Gotcha Day, Max!!!
May 17, 2012 - 8:11 am
Treva -Oh how precious! I LOVE the rockaby baby clip! I’m so proud of the development and happiness in this little man. Congratulations on your first year!
May 17, 2012 - 10:17 am
keight-i LOVE him. so cool. what a happy day for your family!
We got our first harvest out of our garden…I picked one cherry tomato and 2 jalapeno peppers. I’m pretty sure the cabbage is close to being ready to harvest, but I’m not 100% sure about that yet – it still needs a bit of time, I think. A couple heads in our cabbage patch are pretty big…the others are not doing as well, thanks to the cabbage worm invasion at the beginning of the season. But soon, I think. For now, we have a bunch of green tomatoes that will be ripening, soon…and we have blooms on our squash, zucchini, and cucumber plants. I also spied a tiny bell pepper this morning, when I was out checking on the status of everything. I’ve got to brush up on when to harvest everything – I’m always afraid of letting things go too long – like that one time that I let our broccoli flower before I realized I should’ve already picked it. Or the time I had given up on our okra and one day walked out and realized we had one 7-inch okra growing. Oh well, fortunately (I hope!), we’re not growing any thing too difficult this year.
While Nathan was away for those 2 weeks, I’d gotten really lax about walking Iliya to school. It was just easier to not be in such a hurry each morning, and just jump in the car for a quick drive up to the school. Last week, I was still feeling lazy, and yesterday, I decided I’d had enough. If Max isn’t going to be able to stay in our gym’s child watch by himself, then I must get some form of exercise. So, after Max and I walked Iliya to school, we took a run through the neighborhood (I use the word “run” very loosely). And something I learned – that I actually knew, but was really more-or-less reiterated – is that I can handle any day’s stress much, much better if I get in some activity and fresh air. Max makes for an excellent workout partner, too, I must say.
A few days ago, we grilled out with Nathan’s parents. I had gone into the kitchen to ask Nathan’s mom if there was anything else I could do, and she handed me the tray of green beans to put on the grill. I didn’t admit this at the time, but I was nervous about even opening the grill. Why? Because up until just a few days ago, the grill had never, ever been even close to the realm of my territory – growing up, it was always my dad’s, and as a married person, it’s been Nathan’s. I’m fairly certain I’ve never opened a grill by myself, much less placed anything on one. That’s sort of weird to admit, because I think of myself as pretty resourceful…but when it comes to things like grilling and shooting guns, I’m more than happy to leave those two to Nathan.
In the year that Max has been with us, I can count on one hand the packages of diapers I’ve had to buy. I bought a couple packages when we were in Russia (since it didn’t make sense to take diapers when we could just buy them there), and maybe twice since we’ve been home – both of those times were when we were on a trip and I hadn’t carried enough diapers to make it home. Between the couponing/stocking up I did last Spring and diaper showers, we had built up quite the stockpile! And boy, am I ever grateful! Unfortunately, we’re nearing the end of our supply, but it’s been a most excellently awesome run!
My Iliya is such a perfectionist when it comes to creating. He loves to draw, color, build, glue, string…you name it, he enjoys it. He has such a creative streak and I’m continuously amazed by his vision. But one small mistake (even a minute one that no one else would be able to see) and he comes apart (and unless you’ve seen it, you just can’t imagine how upset he gets). I can’t quite figure it out, because this is the only area that he seems to really be this way. We used to think that it was because he wasn’t getting attention while he was creating…but apparently that’s not the case, because he does it whether we’re working with him, simply sitting in the room with him, or in another room altogether. There are times when I can see his frustration beginning to build and I can intervene and help him out…but many times, he seems to be working just fine, making something beautiful, and a meltdown hits at full-strength in a nanosecond, and he’s already fully upset with torn or crumpled up paper at his feet before I even know he’s frustrated. This is a conundrum that we’re not really sure how to handle. Nathan and I have discussed putting all of his art/building supplies up, because we’re weary of dealing with the drama that usually accompanies them…but at the same time, we know that the only way Iliya will be able to deal with mistakes is for us to guide him in handling them. I know part of it is that he is comfortable at home, to behave this way, but it is definitely tiring. Now, if only he’d feel this sense of perfectionism when it came to things like making his bed. :)
In case you’ve missed it, we have an 18-week share of a CSA. We’ve already been receiving our weekly boxes of veggies and have not been disappointed. We did, however, receive one veggie that I’d never seen before and had to do some research on it.It’s a kohlrabi…and I had no idea what to expect. It was tempting to just get rid of it, but I decided that I needed to practice what I preach to the kiddos….don’t knock something till you’ve tried it. So, I washed it (technically 3 of them), peeled it, sliced it up, chopped up the leaves and sauteed it all with some garlic and spices. I’m not sure what I was expecting – mostly for it to taste okay, I guess. But this thing was DELISH. Sort of tasted like broccoli with the texture of a cooked potato. Who knew?!
And that’s it! For now, at least, consider my brain dumped.
Elle-The change in temperatures between the South and the Northwest is amazing. You are harvesting tomatoes and we are just now planting them. I started my tomato plants in the greenhouse back in February and just set them out on Monday. I won’t harvest any ripe fruit until at least late July, if I’m lucky. When your zucchini comes up keep in mind that when you think, “maybe I’ll harvest that tomorrow” pick it then. Tomorrow it will be 2′ long.
I completely understand your fear of the grill. I wouldn’t use ours or if I did I would use the charcoal grill because the gas grill scared me. Once Derek started leaving the gas tank on I was more comfortable with it. Yesterday I grilled my lunch. I put the cast iron skillet on one side and sautéed some cremini mushrooms, grilled sweet onions and made up some corn tortillas to make tacos. I threw a jalapeño, a few tablespoons of roasted pumpkin seeds, a clove of garlic, a big bunch of cilantro and some oil in the food processor to make a cilantro pesto to go on top. It was great!
Today is my 135th post of this year. I’ve hesitated to really post much about that (366 post) goal I decided I would try to meet this year, since – though I’m not a superstitious person – I’ve been sort of afraid I would jinx myself. I guess I still could drop the ball, but I’m rather enjoying myself. This is not to say that posting every day is easy, by any means. Afterall, there’s only so much excitement happening around our way (which is actually the way I like it, believe it or not), and there have been many days that I struggle to even want to post anything. You can definitely tell when I’m prone to a lull (you know, in the ‘old days,’ I would’ve just let things go by the wayside for a week or two) because when I’m feeling blah about writing, then you just get to enjoy random pictures from our days. Writer’s block is no stranger to me, even especially when I’m trying to post every day of the year.
It has been fun, though…and here’s to the next 231 posts of this year!
Now…I started this post during naptime, intending to finish it tonight. I’ve got a scrap piece of paper with notes about a few things I want to blog about…but I got side tracked in a major way tonight. I realized, today (thanks to Iliya’s 150 questions about what he could eat), that we were fresh out of snacks…so I decided it might be a good idea to whip up a couple easy things tonight. Iliya had specifically requested marshmallows, so Nathan and I decided to tackle that one. But do you know how long it takes maple syrup to reach 240-degrees?
Entirely too long! So this means that my random post will just have to make its appearance tomorrow…or another time, depending on how tomorrow ends up going.
I’m not sure how I stumbled upon what I’m sharing with you today. But it really hit home with me… I’ve really been trying to be more unplugged, lately, but haven’t been successful enough. I keep my phone with me so much – afterall, I’ve got a great excuse. What if I miss a photo op? What if I miss a chance to Tweet Max or Iliya’s latest antics? What If…?
And after I read the article that follows, I decided that my phone – even when held close for those What If moments – is too much of a distraction for me. It’s too easy to take a peek at my email or to see if I’ve had a call or text or to check Twitter or Facebook for just a sec. And then those moments often stretch into short chunks of time that have been known to lead to a half hour of distraction. No, not everytime, but often times, one thing leads to another, and my kids are desperate for my attention before I finally realize the reason they’re acting out is because – although I’m with them, physically – I haven’t been with them completely.
So I’ve decided that if my goal is to return to a simpler way, with things like our eating and personal hygiene (one of these days, I will get around to posting about that!), then I should do the same with regard to the time I spend with my family. So, if you try calling me or texting me or emailing me and I don’t answer right away, it’s not because I don’t want to. It’s because I’ve probably got my phone on silent to keep it from being a distraction. It’s because I’m putting it in my purse and am committing to checking it only a few times a day, mostly when the kids are asleep. After I finish this post, I’m putting my computer down, and will not be picking it up during those precious moments I should be spending with my family.
And finally, I challenge you, if you have children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, husbands, wives, or any other important relationship in your life…read the following article and challenge yourself to the very same thing – unplug yourself. Put down your phone and put your effort into those relationships. Join me in this endeavor, and I bet we’ll see better, more productive relationships…fewer discipline problems with our kids, and will find a part of ourselves we lost with the invention of things like the internet and smart phones.
I wish I could take credit for the following article; alas, I cannot. But if you’re interested in reading it straight from the horse’s mouth, and/or reading others like it, then just click here to be taken to the website for Hands Free Mama. I only stumbled upon her website late last night, so I can’t vouch for any other content other than what’s in this article…but I imagine it will all be worth a read.
By sharing my own painful truths when it comes to the distractions of the modern age, I have gained an unexpected insight. In the 18 months this blog has existed, I have been privy to a new distraction confession every single day.
Up until now, I never knew what to do with this unusual collection of painful admissions from an overly connected society. But today, in a moment of clarity, I knew. And a woman with 35 years experience as a day care provider held the key.
It came as a message in my inbox after the woman read my post “The Children Have Spoken” which included heart-breaking observations from children themselves about their parents’ excessive phone use.
As soon as I read the first sentence of the caregiver’s email, I knew this message was different than any I had ever received. The hairs on my arms stood up as I absorbed each word that came uncomfortably close to home.
It was a voice of heartache, wisdom, and urgency speaking directly to the parents of the 21st century:
“I can recall a time when you were out with your children you were really with them. You engaged in a back and forth dialog even if they were pre-verbal. You said, ‘Look at the bus, see the doggie, etc.’ Now I see you on the phone, pushing your kids on the swings while distracted by your devices. You think you are spending time with them but you are not present really. When I see you pick up your kids at day care while you’re on the phone, it breaks my heart. They hear your adult conversations. What do they overhear? What is the message they receive? I am not important; I am not important.”
In a 100-word paragraph this concerned woman who has cared for babies since 1977 revealed a disturbing recipe … How to Miss a Childhood.
And because I possess hundreds of distraction confessions, including stories from my own former highly distracted life, I have all the damaging ingredients.
All it takes is one child and one phone and this tragic recipe can be yours.
How to Miss a Childhood
Keep your phone turned on at all times of the day. Allow the rings, beeps, and buzzes to interrupt your child midsentence; always let the caller take priority.
Carry your phone around so much that when you happen to leave it in one room your child will come running with it proudly in hand—treating it more like a much needed breathing apparatus than a communication device.
Decide the app you’re playing is more important than throwing the ball in the yard with your kids. Even better, yell at them to leave you alone while you play your game.
Take your children to the zoo and spend so much time on your phone that your child looks longingly at the mother who is engaged with her children and wishes she was with her instead.
While you wait for the server to bring your food or the movie to start, get out your phone and stare at it despite the fact your child sits inches away longing for you talk to him.
Go to your child’s sporting event and look up periodically from your phone thinking she won’t notice that you are not fully focused on her game.
Check your phone first thing in the morning … even before you kiss, hug, or greet the people in your family.
Neglect daily rituals like tucking your child into bed or nightly dinner conversation because you are too busy with your online activity.
Don’t look up from your phone when your child speaks to you or just reply with an “uh huh” so she thinks you were listening.
Lose your temper with your child when he “bothers” you while you are interacting with your hand-held electronic device.
Give an exasperated sigh when your child asks you to push her on the swing. Can’t she see you’re busy?
Use drive time to call other people regardless of the fact you could be talking to your kids about their day—or about their worries, their fears, or their dreams.
Read email and text messages at stoplights. Then tell yourself that when your kids are old enough to drive they won’t remember you did this all the time.
Have the phone to your ear when she gets in or out of the car. Convince yourself a loving hello or goodbye is highly overrated.
Follow this recipe and you will have:
Missed opportunities for human connection
Fewer chances to create beautiful memories
Lack of connection to the people most precious to you
Inability to really know your children and them unable to know you
Overwhelming regret
If you find this recipe difficult to read—if you find that you have tears in your eyes, I thank you, and your child thanks you.
It is not easy to consider the possibility that the distractions of the modern age have taken an undeserved priority over the people who matter in your life. In fact, when I admitted this difficult truth to myself almost two years ago, I experienced an emotional breakdown. However, that breakdown became a breakthrough that propelled me to begin my life-changing “Hands Free” journey.
Here’s the thing: You don’t have to follow the above recipe. Yes, it is the 21st century. Yes, the whole world is online. Yes, the communications for your job are important. Yes, at times you must be readily available. But despite all those factors, you do not have to sacrifice your child’s childhood; nor do you have to sacrifice your life.
May I recommend this recipe instead?
How to Grasp a Childhood:
Look into her eyes when she speaks to you … Your uninterrupted gaze is love to your child.
Take time to be with him—really be with him by giving your full attention … The gift of your total presence is love to your child.
Hold her hand, rub his back, listen to her heart beat, and smooth his hair … Your gentle touch is love to your child.
Greet her like you missed her when she was not in your presence … Seeing your face light up when you see her is love to your child.
Play with him … Your involvement in his activities is love to your child.
Set an example of being distraction-free while driving … Positive role modeling behind the wheel is love (and safety) to your child.
Create a distraction-free daily ritual … Consistently making him a priority each day is love to your child.
Focus and smile at her from the stands, sidelines, or the audience … Seeing the joy on your face as you watch is love to your child.
The recipe for “How to Grasp a Childhood” requires only one thing: You must put down your phone. Whether it is for ten minutes, two hours, or an entire Saturday, beautiful human connection, memory making, and parent-child bonding can occur every single time you let go of distraction to grasp what really matters.
The beautiful, life-changing results of your “Hands Free” action can start today … right now … the moment you put down the phone.
My life changed the day I stopped justifying my highly distracted life and admitted I was missing precious moments that I would never retrieve. I imagined my daughter standing on the stage of her high school graduation and asked myself: When she is 18 years old, will I wish I had spent more time on my phone/work/social life? Or will I wish I had spent more time investing in her?
One year ago, we commemorated the Russian Victory Day holiday ….actually IN Russia. It was a rainy, dreary, cold day to celebrate a holiday I’d never much thought about…in a country I’d never planned to visit before 6 years ago. A country that now holds a special place in my heart for being the birthplace of the 2 precious children I’m so thankful for.
I was driving down the road today, in my own little world, when I realized that I heard Max talking up a storm in the backseat. When I checked on him in the rearview mirror, I noticed he was reading a book. So, I pulled over, grabbed my phone and caught a little bit of the story on video.
Your guess is as good as mine, as to what he was reading…but it sounded pretty good, I thought!
Max has been displaying a lot of regressive behavior, lately. In the past several days, he has been doing things he hasn’t done in a while – playing on his stomach, rocking in the middle of the floor (like he does in his bed to go to sleep at night), having trouble sleeping and pitching these huge, gargantuan fits. It’s been perplexing and not only a little bit frustrating.
And then today, he fell fast asleep in record time at naptime. This evening, he did the same at bedtime, despite having had an awesome nap. It was a bit unusual, because of his difficulty sleeping lately. And then, it was like a lightbulb went off in my head and I finally got a clue.
I think he could be about to experience a cognitive burst….and maybe even a growth spurt. His vocabulary is ever-increasing and I’d bet that he’s about to grow right out of the clothes he’s currently wearing.
We shall see.
Now, for a quick funny.
On Sunday, I hadn’t gotten my act together to have lunch ready for us to eat after church service, so we ended up going out to eat. Nathan, Iliya, and Max ended up with to-go boxes, and we wrote each of their initials on their respective boxes.
Iliya stacked them up in age order – Max’s on the bottom, his in the middle, and Nathan’s on top.
He explained it like this, “You see? Max is the littlest, Daddy is the biggest, and I’m….the teenagerest.”
Elle-Those cognitive bursts were (are) the worst for us. When they happen (about every 6 months) life is a living hell around here. We haven’t had one since October. We’re overdue around here… uh oh.
May 7, 2012 - 9:52 pm
Katie -Thanks for the laugh! Sounds like Iliya should be a comedian when he grows up.
May 9, 2012 - 4:06 am
Aunt Kristy -He and Tabi are on the same schedule, it would seem. She’s been eating us out of house and home with quite the little temper and potty accidents lately. Bless em both (and their mommies and daddies)!!
Max met a permanent marker for the first time today, when my back was turned after negligently leaving said permanent market within his reach.
Fortunately, I have some essential oils on hand and have used some of the citrus oils to remove paint from my hands….so I pulled out my tangerine oil, doused a small bit of a paper towel, and wiped the permanent market from Max’s nose.
Aunt Kristy -Could have been worse! He could have gone after the wall, door facing, and tile floor like Tabitha…
May 5, 2012 - 8:50 pm
Stacy-Oh! Saw the header and cringed!! Good to see that it all worked out.
May 5, 2012 - 9:38 pm
Heather Houston-Hmmm…I had no idea that the tangerine oil could remove permanent marker. Looks like I’ll be making a trip to purchase some. I need to keep that on hand with my little 2-year-old munchkin. She finds everything that is “off-limits”. LOL
May 6, 2012 - 5:53 am
Cindi L-I had no idea tangerine oil would remove paint (or permanent maker :) ). VERY good to know. :) Lovin’ the shirt. :)
May 6, 2012 - 6:46 am
Melissa-Just FYI, any citrus oil should work…I actually prefer orange oil but had run out of it (it’s awesome for getting off price tag/ label goo, too!)
It’s a kohlrabi…and I had no idea what to expect. It was tempting to just get rid of it, but I decided that I needed to practice what I preach to the kiddos….don’t knock something till you’ve tried it. So, I washed it (technically 3 of them), peeled it, sliced it up, chopped up the leaves and sauteed it all with some garlic and spices. I’m not sure what I was expecting – mostly for it to taste okay, I guess. But this thing was DELISH. Sort of tasted like broccoli with the texture of a cooked potato. Who knew?!
by Melissa
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