For 2 solid months, Iliya didn’t see Nathan. We chatted online, some, so they did get to “see” each other that way…but it was very difficult, because of Nathan’s internet connection. It seemed like it was always on the fritz – either super slow or completely out. So when we did video chat, it was mostly in still frames, but we were definitely not going to be ungrateful for something we didn’t have, a mere 5 or 10 years ago! So we managed to get in some sort of conversation, either by internet or phone, most nights.
But even with all the awesome technology available at our fingertips, there is a huge difference between talking/seeing a picture of someone talking, and being in their presence, able to touch them, and hear their voice coming from their physical body in the room with you. Aside from the first 20 months of his life (which we won’t count, since we didn’t exist for him back then), 2 months is the longest that Iliya has ever been without Nathan.
I think it goes without saying that they missed each other dearly.
So on July 1, it was time to head to Texas! Since: 1) our flight left so early, and 2) the airport is a time zone ahead of where we live and 3) we would’ve had to leave our house at 3:30 AM to get to the airport in time to make it through security, I decided it would be best to head over the night before and stay in a hotel so we wouldn’t have to get up quite so early. After work on June 30, one of our good friends drove me and Iliya to the hotel 2 hours away (I couldn’t just drive myself, because we would be flying back into a different airport, so it wouldn’t make sense for me to leave my car, ultimately, 6 hours from our final destination – which was the beach. More on that in a different post).
Anyway, we got to the hotel, and Iliya was wired. He hadn’t stayed in a hotel in quite some time, and he was SO excited. The first thing he did was hop on then bed and lay down to test it out.
He gave his signature of approval, when he told me his bed was lousy (which, apparently, is a good thing, in his mind) and began jumping on it. Of course, being the practical parent that I am, the first thing I wanted to do was to make him stop…but then I realized that if I were him, I’d want to jump on the bed with excitement, too! So jump on the bed, he did!
(Yep, he has his shoes on as he jumps on the bed. I must’ve been more excited than I realized, to let that sort of shenanigan take place!)
Then, it was bath and bedtime, which he was none too excited about, but tiredness finally won out and he fell asleep.
The next morning, we got up and made our way out to the shuttle that would take us to the airport. Iliya’s carseat was attached to our brand new carseat carrierand since it was the first time I’d traveled with it, I was a little nervous about un-attaching it before we actually got to the airport…I wasn’t sure how easily I could get it back on. So, we hopped right on the shuttle bus and Iliya rode without a carseat. Apparently, with all my nerves about unattaching his carseat from the carrier, I was less nervous about him riding in a bus with just a lap belt…afterall, when you’ve ridden with no seat belt OR car seat in downtown Moscow and Vladivostok, what’s a 1 mile trip down the road, in Atlanta with only a lap belt?*
*No, I wasn’t really that flippant about my decision. The car seat wouldn’t have fit in the bus seats anyway. :) And you people who have braved Russian traffic with no safety restraints understand why I wasn’t that worried :)
On the shuttle, with a BIG yawn!
So we made it to the airport, with Iliya entertaining all 4 of the the other sleepy passengers on the shuttle bus with his commentary on all the airplanes we saw taking off and landing. Oh MAMA!, he would shout and startle all of us from our quasi-slumber, look at that BIG airplane!! That’s the biggest one I’ve EVER seen!!
When I decided to take Iliya’s car seat with us (Nathan had left his here, for my sister to use, since she would be keeping Iliya during the summer, so he didn’t have one in his car that was with him in TX), I was a little worried how I would navigate the airport with both Iliya and his carseat in tow. I’m telling you, his car seat is a monster. I’ll admit (though for some reason, it pains me a little to do so), to begin with, I was a little nervous about flying by myself with Iliya, and I did all I could to make sure that our trip would be smooth. I had already determined that I would just spend the money to check our suitcase, and would only take 2 small carry-ons (my purse & his little backpack). But, since we’d never traveled with a car seat (and honestly, we hadn’t even flown with Iliya since we arrived home from Russia in August 2007), how to handle it was an enigma to me. I did a little researching, and finally decided on purchasing a Go Go Kidz contraption. I had no idea if it would work…I certainly couldn’t justify spending $90 on a brand new one, so I went with the recycled/refurbished option for $20 less, and figured that if it didn’t work out, then at least I hadn’t paid full price for it.
But check out this handy little thing!
(that’s a cinnamon roll he’s munching on for breakfast)
I’m pretty sure that I can be responsible for purchases of about a dozen of these things, just from parents stopping me in the middle of the airport to ask me what it was, where I got it, and how they could get one, too! It was worth its weight in GOLD, I tell you. It was easy to attach, and I got to be a super pro at navigating security with a car seat!
Speaking of security, Iliya was very nervous about it. He didn’t like the idea of putting his shoes, bag, carseat, or anything else, on the conveyor belt that fed into the black box. He honestly thought they were taking everything away, and couldn’t grasp that they were just checking it to make sure it was safe, and that he would get it back again. A little time has passed since that day, but if I remember correctly, I think he came dangerously close to tears about the whole issue. But we walked right through security, and all of his things were waiting for him, safely, on the other side of that big box. (Whew!)
When it came time to board the plane, Iliya and I took advantage of the “passengers traveling with small children” call, so we could get settled into our seats before the madness of people shoving around and stuffing luggage into overhead bins.
Iliya was SO. VERY. EXCITED. about traveling on his first airplane since he (as he put it) “was a baby.” I’m sure it had nothing to do with the fact that he would very soon be spending time with his daddy!
Okay, well…truth be told, the real excitement came from my telling him that he would be able to chew gum on the plane. When I told him that (which was a huge surprise to him, because I’d never allowed him to chew gum before) he almost burst with excitement! I told him he couldn’t have any until we got settled on the plane, and we were ready to take off…you’ve never seen a child be so ready to get on an airplane and get the journey started. He had so much to look forward to!
As a sidenote, Iliya actually has proven to be a very responsible gum-chewer…while I don’t give it to him often, I have relaxed a little on my “no gum, ever” policy. He does smack it a little (it tastes soooo good!) but that’s actually kind of cute (in a “that’s-cute-but-lets-try-to-close-our-mouth-when-we-chew-gum” kind of way)…and he’s only swallowed his gum once, which completely freaked him out. When he’s done with it, he throws it in the trash – I guess I’ve done a good job with the gum rules, and we definitely have a rule-abiding child on our hands.
But I digress…
So we got on the plane, had a very good plane ride – I read a book while Iliya watched movies on the iP0d, ate peanuts, and drank some apple juice.
It was such a different plane ride from 3 years ago, in so many ways! But good ways, almost all of them, except for the fact that this time, he was all about being independent, and is no longer small enough for me to snuggle him as we fly. Which, I guess, is actually a good thing, too.
Anyway, we finally landed in the San Antonio airport, deboarded the plane, and……
(anyone else have a song running through their head, now? You’re welcome. :) )
Before I proceed with my next installment of our Summer Recap, I think it’s time for a Check-In. I’d love to know who is still reading after all these years, who is new, and…well, if you’ve quit reading, I guess you won’t even see this, so that part doesn’t really matter.
This blog is small-time, compared to many other blogs…it started (4 1/2 years ago! Wow!) as a way to keep our families informed of our Russian adoption experience. I figured I’d post while we were in the adoption process, and then life would go back to normal after we were done. Who knew that our new normal life would include blogging? But I digress… Anyway, no matter how small-time it is, comparatively, I’ve still got WAAAY more readers than I ever imagined I would ever have. I mean when my first readers were my mom, sister, mother-in-law, sister-in-law, and a handful of aunts & friends, I would’ve laughed if you had told me that I would one day look at my statcounter map and realize that I had readers from all over the world.
I know, I’ve covered all that before, but I figure it bears repeating occasionally. I average about 150 hits a day (and yes, I know that some of you may be multiple “hitters”) and an average of 2.3 comments per post.
So it makes me curious…
Who are you? Why did you start reading my blog? How long have you been reading? Of course, you can answer any of these (or none of the above) by clicking “Leave a Comment” below (which is preferrable) or the “Email Me!” link above, if you’re embarrassed to admit, publicly, that you enjoy keeping up with our family. :) Ask me a question. Or just sign your name saying you read.
Satisfy my curiosity! Yes, I mean you. Even if I know you IRL. :)
And help me get that “The Who” song out of my head…okay?
Laura Bohler Forman-Hey there! I have been reading your blog since you went to Russia to get Iliya. I have been so excited to follow along with you guys and lift you guys up in prayer as you brought this precious little boy home. And now praying for your 2nd addition! Thanks for being real and keeping us all updated! :)
August 31, 2010 - 8:00 am
Cecilia Nettleton -I have been following you and about 10 families who have brought children home from Russia. My niece started all this back in 2007. I live in SC.
August 31, 2010 - 8:00 am
Stacy Harrison-Hi! Been reading your blog off and on for about 2 1/2 years. Because we also have a son from Russia–Krasnoyarsk-home 4/2008. We live in Northern Virginia about 35 miles north and west of Washington, D. C. Enjoy hearing about your joys and triumphs!
Stacy
August 31, 2010 - 8:04 am
Julie Owen -I check your blog every morning :)
August 31, 2010 - 8:24 am
Penne Hatcher -I have been following for a few weeks. I found you from another blog (honestly can’t remember whose) when you started fundraising for your domestic adoption. We have adopted two children from Chile – which is almost impossible to do unless like us you actually live there as residents. Yes, we live in Santiago, Chile. My huband, family and I are missionaries here – for now. Anyway, I wanted and want to support any and all adoptions and I LOVE reading the beautiful stories and the way God builds a family!
August 31, 2010 - 8:56 am
Cindy Schardt -Hi! I’ve been reading your blog for over two years now. I brought my daughter, Vika, home from Vlad also. She was from a baby home in Ussuryisk. Our gotcha day was September 2008. I love seeing how much Iliya has grown since I started reading the blog. He’s such a cute little man. Thanks!
August 31, 2010 - 9:13 am
kali-I’ve been reading since you started the adoption process for Iliya…we’re planning to adopt from Russia or Ukraine in a couple of years (just had our first son in January) and I love reading about other people’s experiences. Iliya’s a cutie!!!
August 31, 2010 - 9:33 am
Krystal -I started reading a few months after Iliya came home. You came and spoke to a class I was in at UA, and I was actually observing the class right next to him at the CDRC. I started reading then, and I’m still reading now! :)
August 31, 2010 - 9:59 am
Andrea -Hey there! I’m still here…even though I do not post many comments anymore, I do still enjoy catching up with you guys and seeing such cute pics and videos of Little Man! I have read your blog since day 1 and will be a loyal fan until the end…which I hope doesn’t happen anytime soon! Lol… Love y’all!
August 31, 2010 - 10:08 am
Rob O.-Dede & I started lurking about your old blog (via Google Reader) back when we were all waiting for our first trips. Best guess, I’d say about 4 years or so.
It’s been a wild ride for us all!
August 31, 2010 - 10:38 am
Laura-Hi! I’m still reading. I found you through Becky who I work with. We adopted our son from Colombia about the same time you adopted Iliya and I think they are relatively close in age so its been fun to see them grow.
August 31, 2010 - 1:22 pm
maggie -My husband and I are awaiting court date from Russia. Found your blog through another blogger..
August 31, 2010 - 1:34 pm
Mom -What I want to know is…what is the “Who? song??? and yes, I occasionally check your blog (probably at least 3 to 5 times a day :o) to see if you’ve updated it. Enjoyed the summer recaps…especially the travels of Pink Bear. We should have done the reverse that weekend and you could have posted what all kinds fun Iliya had, too…maybe next time. We’re so very thankful that Nathan is back home safely!
August 31, 2010 - 1:50 pm
Heidi -hi have been reading your blog since you bought iliya home love seeing him growing up, he is soooo cute x
August 31, 2010 - 7:56 pm
Heidi Winterhack -We have been reading since you began the blog from the CHI website. We have a three year-old little girl from Vlad. We live in central Wisconsin and are adopting again in December from the Ukraine.
August 31, 2010 - 8:12 pm
Mich Mama -still checking in about once a week
August 31, 2010 - 8:35 pm
Debbie-I am also an adoptive Mom from Russia (Tver Region). My son is also named Ilya. We adopted through Childrens Hope and that is where we found all of you. My son is 16 now but adopted 5 years ago. My son is happy to know there is another Ilya in America even though the spelling isn’t the same. Your son is precious and it has been a privilege to watch him grow.
Blessings,
Debbie and Ilya from Chicago
August 31, 2010 - 10:41 pm
Lindsay -lol, still here after all this this time. I started reading whilst I was waiting to adopt number one, Hannah which was back in 2006/early 2007. Tomorrow I bring home number 2, 7 month old Sofia, so who knows if I will have the energy to read much over the next few weeks :) Wishing you all the best with your second adoption too.
September 1, 2010 - 5:28 am
Myra-I have been reading your blog for a while – probably a couple of years (I found you on Becky’s Russian peanut blog). My husband and I have adopted twice from Russia (older boys). One is from Vladivostok (7/2008) and one is from Tver (11/2006). We adopted both boys through Children’s Hope.
You do an amazing job with your blog and I love your photography as well. Your son is very blessed to have you and your husband. He is absolutely adorable!
Myra
September 1, 2010 - 7:25 am
Rebecca -I’ve been reading since you were in Russia on your court trip. We brought our son home from Kazan, Russia, in March 2008 and are in the process of adopting again, this time from St. Petersburg.
September 1, 2010 - 9:41 am
Christen L-Christen L – From Chicago. Reading for a long while. Started reading back when you were adopting from Russia because we were planning to adopt. But you know most of this!! :)
September 1, 2010 - 11:54 am
Rachel W -Started reading your blog when we first started our Russian adoption journey – Now that’s it years later – still reading! We’re excited about your next journey!
September 1, 2010 - 1:04 pm
Christine AKA Mommie2my3girls -Met you way back when on TLOL military board I dont even know how many years now and I have been reading your blog every morning since you started it :)
September 1, 2010 - 1:09 pm
Amy -Hi Melissa:
I have been reading your blog for a year or so now. I enjoy reading about Iliya and the fun you have all have as a family. As a mother of two boys, I know how much fun they can be each and every day. Blessings to your family and baby number 2! Amy
September 1, 2010 - 6:30 pm
Becky-I will comment if, and only if, you find a way to get The Who out of my head!!! :-) You know me… via blogland and IRL, of course! As a side note, we were going to visit with Karyn and Ilya the other day and Andrew got all into Ilya1 vs. Ilya2. The boy remembers everything!
September 1, 2010 - 8:47 pm
Nancy Harris -I think I have been with you guys sense it started. I love reading about all the things you do. So glad that Nate is home you with you. Love you
September 2, 2010 - 9:58 am
Anne -Hello Melissa! I’ve been reading your blog (and love it!) since you were in process with Iliya. I adopted my son Evan through Childrens Hope and he’s been home since Nov 2007! He was born in Ussuriysk (Vladivostok region). You do an amazing job with your blog! I tried keeping a blog, but I don’t have the gift (or the patience) so am just keeping a little journal for him. I’m going to start the adoption process again in 2011 – hoping to go back to Vlad, but I’m single, so not sure if that will happen…
I’m excited reading about your next journey!
Anne & Evan from Chicago suburbs
September 2, 2010 - 11:12 am
Kim Luensmann -Started reading your blog about 2 years ago when my husband’s cousin & her husband were adopting 2 brothers from Russia. Started reading Susan’s blog and then yours. I have kept up with you both to this day and think your families are fabulous. Good luck with your new arrival!
September 2, 2010 - 3:44 pm
Lyndsey -I’ve been reading your blog for about 2 years, since I started looking into Russian adoption. I’m sure I found you through another blogger, but I can’t remember which one. Iliya is precious, and I’m so excited for your family as you prepare for a little brother or sister for Iliya.
So you got a few updates from this summer…And by a few, I suppose I mean one.
Oops…sorry!
Well…I guess that’s not entirely true. Afterall, I did mention our fun at the “Russia Reunion,” (parts ONE & TWO) back in June. Even so, I’ve talked often of just how busy & crazy our summer has been, yet I never got around to really sharing everything we had been up to. I’d had such high hopes for being a good blogger this summer. Alas, it didn’t really work out like I had planned.
Nathan left us for the summer – he left May 1, and was gone for 4 months, to complete a military training course in San Antonio, Texas. It’s amazing how much one person really matters in the goings on of a family…I think I wear a lot of “hats” during our normal life, but never realize how many I actually share with Nathan, until he’s gone for a while!
We’d had plenty of time to prepare for his absence, but his absences always hit really hard. Much harder than I anticipate, even!
Here is Nathan, learning how to do his job, all over again (that’s a training/practice weapon, by the way ) -
Don’t you just love a man in uniform?! I sure do! (now quit ogling mine and continue reading…:))
If you’ll remember, Nathan was gone for 6 weeks last year, so we’d had a little practice with separation (well, Nathan and I have had plenty of practice, over the years, but this was only our second separation – of longer than a week or so – since Iliya has been home). All things considered, it could’ve been much more difficult, but I do not like being apart! Iliya especially didn’t care for it…he did remarkably well, but let me know on a very regular basis, just how much he missed his daddy.
I had meant to keep up with & privately blog about how we were coping, and just save the posts till Nathan got home again (I didn’t really want to advertise his absence in such a public venue)…..but as with just regular blogging, I never really got around to it. So, in short, we had our good days, and our bad days…but we made it through. Was it easy? No. And my hat is completely off to fulltime single parents, who make the job seem so effortless.
In addition to lots of prayer, we got by with the help of the phone and computer. We had to improvise a little bit, since both Nathan’s phone and computer connections were a little off-kilter, but at least we had them! Here, we are playing a little game of “I Spy”…
The other thing that helped us get by were a couple of visits. I was able to find some really cheap flights between us and San Antonio, and thanks to my MIL & BIL, and their airline rewards programs, they secured a few flights for us. First, I went to San Antonio over Memorial Day weekend, while Iliya stayed with my parents…and then later, Iliya and I flew out for the 4th of July. I’m really thankful to have had the opportunity to break up our separation into more manageable chunks.
And these chunks are what I will show you over the next few posts.
First, let’s cover my quick trip over Memorial Day weekend.
Nathan had been gone for a month at that point, and I had found a really cheap flight…it was cheap, but not quite cheap enough for me to get 2 tickets, so I decided to see if my parents could keep Iliya for the weekend while I hopped a plane to San Antonio for a couple days. As it turned out, my BIL was able to use his airline rewards program to purchase the ticket for me (and in turn, I was able to purchase one extra flight for Iliya and I to fly out to see Nathan actually graduate from his school in August…more on that later).
We had a fantastic couple of days together – I like to think that this time together was to make up for our last several anniversaries, where we haven’t actually gone anywhere special, just the 2 of us.
We missed Iliya, but we did have a nice time, spending quality time together. It’s amazing what a mandatory separation will do as a reminder to not take time together for granted!
For my trip, Iliya sent me with one of his favorite toys. Pink Bear is a stuffed animal given to Iliya by a lady that goes to church with us, and Iliya thought that my traveling with Pink Bear would remind me of him. Of course, you know it did…and I actually carried the bear in my purse the whole weekend. We ended up taking pictures of the bear when we went places, and it became a fun thing for us. So I put together a little video to tell Iliya more about what Pink Bear did on our trip to Texas. I lost several pictures in an accidental deletion, so there are a few of Pink Bear flying on the airplane and other fun stuff that didn’t make it to the video. But it was fun to put this together, nonetheless.
We call this montage “The Adventures of Pink Bear.”
So that wraps up the first “leg” of our summer separation. I’ve already covered our June beach trip, so next up, seeing Daddy again for a long weekend!
Christine AKA Mommie2my3girls -I love the recap ! It looks much like some of our summer! Our Daddy also made his appearance this summer after a looong 13 month deployment !!! Very creative the things we do with our little ones over the computer! I am soo glad you guys were able to spend some time together! I hope everything is going well on the adoption front !
August 30, 2010 - 3:35 pm
christenL-This is so timely for Frank and I… we just found out he has to go to training at the federal law enforcement training center in Georgia for 12 weeks. He’s leaving October 5th. I haven’t posted about this on the blog, yet. But, we’re trying to get used to the idea of being separated for 3 months.
I’d love to hear your best advice about how to get through it.
I was in Maine for a clinical rotation for 15 weeks, but that was a little different than being stuck home alone for 3 months…. I think it might have been easier that time because I was the one who was busy.
Yep, I’m here. I haven’t been neglecting you (or my blog) just for fun…things really have been busy (not with an adoption, but with other life happenings). Never fear, though…I’m working on a really good “catch up” post, so bear with me. I’ve got some good stories, pictures, and videos for you…..but getting them all online is proving to be really time consuming.
And why do today what could be put off till I have time to do it? But then again, if I really wait till I have time, then…I might finally have a moment about 50 years from now.
But that just wouldn’t do, now would it?
So today, I’m foregoing my Sunday afternoon nap and working hard to get some good posts together.
What’s that? Oh…..you’re welcome! :)
In the meantime, I thought it would be fun to revisit one of my old videos. I really can’t believe this was taken a little more than 3 years ago. Iliya was 20 months old in this video (not even 2!) and was learning a new language, while we were all learning each other. It was a crazy time, but a good one. And if you’re my mom or sister, you probably watch this video on a regular basis…but for the rest of you (especially those who are new), this is from the just post-adoption phase of our family.
Sarah Housley -Haha! I knew exactly what it was! I think I watched it not too long ago. Thank you for posting– even though I typically know what’s going on in the Bridges family, I still enjoy reading your posts. Now, you need to share three of Iliya’s newest (and “sweetest”) friends/toys/crafts.
August 30, 2010 - 12:04 am
Carolyn Nelson -Does Iliya remember any of the sign language now? Or do you still work with some of the signing? My brother’s little girl started first grade this year and she can spell anything with the sign language word’s and tell you what you are spelling too. She has been worked with like your precious little man. You can tell children who have had lot’s of time spent with them. Candice is on third grade reading level and just going into the first grade. I have been missing your writing so much but knows first hand what it’s like raising children, working and maintaining a home too. You are so great with Iliya and it’s so much fun reading about his growth and the three of you together as a family.
There are a few things that are no secret. Okay, there are lots of things that are no secret, but for today, I’ll concentrate on 3 things, specifically:
We are currently in the domestic adoption process,
We really would like to adopt a newborn,
We really, really wish our children would be spaced a little more closely than 5+ years apart.
The funny thing about all of this is that it all seems so set in stone, but it’s really not, because we’re flexible on almost all of it. Case in point: One of my very best childhood friends sent me an email the other day. Here is what she said:
I know you want to adopt a baby baby [newborn], but would you consider one right under a year? There is a little boy in [her son's] class that [has been] in foster care and [is now able to be adopted].
A few things occurred to me:
Iliya was almost 2 when we adopted him, and even though I did (and sometimes still do) miss that newborn stage with him, there are also nice things about adopting a baby that’s somewhat older than a newborn. I know I’ve talked about this before, but one of those perks is that a non-newborn often sleeps a little better than a newborn. There are others, of course, but that was a pretty significant perk for me, she who really likes to get her sleep.
Adopting a child who is almost 1 (or even 2, if we went that far) would put considerably less “space” between our first two children
We can always adopt a newborn a little bit later.
So what does this mean? It certainly doesn’t mean that we’re deviating from our path of adopting…and at this point, doesn’t mean that we’re deviating from our path to adopting a newborn. I guess what it means is that we are flexible. We realize that a domestic adoption can take quite a while, and we are committed to waiting that while. But, in the meantime, if another situation comes up, and it fits well within our family, then we’re flexible enough to consider almost anything. We figure that we aren’t going to be so rigid as to deny at least the consideration of opportunities that are put before us.
And the cool thing is that our agency is pretty flexible, too. Their stance is that they have done our homestudy, and we are ready for a placement. They are small and work with both a limited number of birthfamilies and adoptive families, so there’s really no telling how long (or short!) of a wait we could have. They don’t have specific limitations on whether or not we choose to pursue a private adoption, or if we end up working alongside another agency (provided that that agency is also okay with us working in tandem with our current agency). They are there to help us anyway they can, while being flexible enough to meet our desire of expanding our family.
Another friend of mine – before we ever formally began our second adoption – suggested that I put the word out on this blog. That if anyone knows of a situation in which a birthmother was ready to place her child in the care of another family, to keep us in mind. Even though I’m posting her suggestion here, I’m not wholly comfortable making that blanket request…simply because I never want our intentions to seem 1) desperate or 2) like we’re asking for some crazy favor out into the unknown.
But. (there’s always a ‘but,’ isn’t there?)
The reason that I have come to feel that it is important to post about this is that I do also understand that situations arise, and if others out there aren’t aware of our willingness to be flexible, then a very good situation could pass by without our ever being aware of it. If my childhood friend hadn’t randomly decided to send me an email about this 1-year old child, then I would’ve never known about the possibility. (Now, it’s time for me to clarify and say that, after some investigation, that situation is almost absolutely not going to happen, but it was a clear reminder that you just. never. know. what dots are there, needing to be connected)
So here I stand, giving you yet one more dot. Hoping that one day (one day soon), it will be connected to the child that is meant to be in our family.
kate-Here are another couple of dots: Would you adopt siblings? That might give you a newborn AND keep your kids closer in age.
Just a thought…
(Yep–I’m back!)
August 10, 2010 - 1:39 pm
Melissa -Interesting dots, Kate, and yes, we would absolutely consider that option. I guess we just never really know how life is going to turn out…and we are not about to be completely closed-minded to any possibility. We’ve learned that you just never really know how/where/when the blessings of life will occur, so we try to stay open!
And I am SO glad you’re back (in an although-I-wish-you-weren’t-miserably-hot-where-you-are sort of glad)…and, of course, hope that we can squeeze into your schedule on your next trip to the States! :)
August 10, 2010 - 3:47 pm
Debbie B-We had a few situations come up during our first adoption and always put some thought and prayer in to each one. You just never know. When we switched to domestic we made sure they knew we were open to a child under 2 but with domestic it’s normally very unlikely unless it’s word of mouth like your friend. But I do have a friend that was waiting and just brought home their son the start of summer and he was 18 months. One just never knows with adoption. Had to explain that to my inlaws recently.
August 10, 2010 - 6:32 pm
ChristenL-I was thinking the same thing as Kate. What about siblings?
I completely understand where your head is at with this topic, though. We’ve done a lot of “what if’s” lately. It’s a strange world this adoption thing…. I fight myself to stop imagining the perfect situation because I don’t want to be disappointed or not live in the moment when everything happens for us. It’s hard, though. I find myself picturing the perfect little boy to fit our family at the perfect age and coming home with absolutely no delays before court. I keep my fingers crossed and say prayers that this is all accurate, but deep down I know better than to expect it.
August 11, 2010 - 12:00 am
Carolyn Nelson -When we adopted our first 2 children they were, Craig age 3 1/2 and Tanya age 18 months. They are siblings and my mother and father adopted the two other boys, Jerry age 9 and Dwayne age 8. Our whole family has been the biggest joy of our lives. We had Craig for only 7 years in our home when he was accidentally killed with a BB Gun. Freak accident. In fact it was 31 years ago 8/9/10. Then a young girl who was 16 at the moment called us out of the clear blue and wanted to know if we would adopt her baby boy, Jason at age 6 months. Yes we did and our family has never been the same since. I too wanted a newborn but God had opened the door for us and Jason was the one he wanted us to have. We took the task at hand and our family is so much better for listening to God. You have a very open mind and you will too listen to what God will give you. Your a VERY SPECIAL MOMMIE for a very special little boy and God has the boy/girl just for your family out there waiting for you three. It will happen for you and it will all be great. By the way, Jason had a sister who was two years old at the time and my husband’s brother and sister-in-law adopted her. My brother Jerry has adopted a little girl who was 16 months when they got her and now she is 6 and so smart you would never believe it. We have 6 adopted children in our immediate family. GOD IS GOOD….
August 12, 2010 - 5:15 pm
Heather-(Tried to email you from this site but it kept giving me an error)We are in adoption process (from U.S. this time. We adopted son from Russia in 2008). Our consultant shared many situations for little boys: http://thespiritofadoption.wordpress.com/2010/08/12/current-available-situations-2/ I know that 1 is with Mother Goose Adoptions and 1 is with A Guardian Angel. Let me know if you’d like contact info.
Ani -When we first started our adoption process (the first time around!) we were ready for a 9-18 month old boy… Well, we got matched with our son, who was 5 weeks old. Second time around, I was ready to be matched with a birth mother, and “felt” we were having another boy… Then we got THE CALL that our daugther, 5 days old, was ready to come home to us. If these adoption processes taught me anything, it was to embrace the unexpected :-)
August 25, 2010 - 9:21 pm
natalie @ our old southern house-my parents tried for 6 years to have me and spent 3 years w/an agency. but listen to how they got me:
my mother was a clerk of the court and meet a lawyer. they got along and he introduced her to his wife and they became friends. mother told his wife that they had been trying for forever and couldn’t have a child. one day the wife was on the phone with a friend who’s husband was a judge. the friend mentioned that while she was at the gynocologist she heard nurses in the hallway talking about a 29 yr old woman who had come in 2 days before her due date who wanted to give the child up for adoption, but didn’t like any of the agencies. the friend mentioned it to the doc who told her more details…she then mentioned it to my mom’s friend…who then mentioned it to my mom. 2 days later they got the call and 2 days after that they picked me up. the judge (the friend’s friend’s husband) did the adoption for my parents.
i say all this to say…you just never know when and where your child will come from. sending prayers your way that your forever child is just around the corner! :-)
Update: It’s midnight, and the Giveaway officially closed. I am absolutely in awe of the turnout we had…I can’t wait to do the drawing tomorrow! It will probably be sometime in the evening before I am able to post the results…we have a lot happening tomorrow, and I want to make sure I have all my ducks in a row. I hope you all have a fantastic Saturday!!
Original Post: Don’t forget, today is your last day to enter the Great Big Giveaway #2! It ends at 11:59 p.m. tonight, and tomorrow, I will be doing a drawing for the following:
-a Nikon D5000 Camera & Photography training video
-a University of Alabama 20×24 professionally framed National Championship print & bonus mousepad
-a beautiful handmade heirloom baby bonnet & bloomers set
-a colorful, poofy tutu
There’s still time to get the word out, too! So pass the word along and then head on over to our Great Big Giveaway #2 and register!!
And just for something fun, this video was taken when we visited our cousins this summer. They have an air hockey table, and Iliya learned from one of the best, how to play!
Christen-I’m so excited for you guys to bring another baby into your beautiful little family! Iliya will be an awesome big brother! I can’t wait to read Iliya-isms that include a little sibling! He’s got to be one of the cutest, most clever kids around!
I cannot believe how many people have contributed towards the adoption! What a blessing to know that you are supported tremendously by your friends and family (and some people you’ve never met!) Anyways, I’m so happy for you guys and I’ve got my fingers crossed for that camera hehehe
This morning, Iliya felt a little nervous, and I felt a little nostalgic.
Back in April, my sister (who is a school teacher) asked me if we would be okay with taking Iliya out of school for the summer, and letting her keep him everyday. At first, I was a little hesitant, only because I know that Iliya is typically a child of routine, and I was a little concerned about taking him out of his normal routine. But, then I thought, this summer (with all our traveling and everything else going on) was going to be out of routine, anyway, so maybe it would be better for him to be able to relax a little and hang out with his Aunt Sarah. I also knew that she understands child development, and the importance of early experiences, so I was comfortable knowing that she wouldn’t just let him come over to her house and simply lay around all summer. So we decided to go for it!
And boy, it worked out handsomely! He really enjoyed the time he got to spend with her, and I think I speak for her, when I say she thoroughly enjoyed the time she spent with him. They did a good combination of laying around and going places – I’m really not sure what all they ended up doing, but I know they had a good time.
We also traveled a good bit – I was very busy for work, and I’m hoping to get around to telling you a little more about our summer, very soon. But as I’ve said many times, suffice it to say, we’ve been quite busy.
So this week has been a bit of an adjustment. No less busy, but just a different kind of busy. Monday was Iliya’s “open house” at school, where he could come say “hi” to his teacher and check out his new classroom (same teacher, same friends, new classroom). He was informed that many of his best friends have been missing him this summer, and they were excited for him to start back to school.
Yesterday was technically the first day of school, but he and Sarah decided they needed just one more day before calling it a summer. So they ran some errands, and Iliya began expressing his dislike for having to go back to school. He’d had it good this summer, so he wasn’t quite ready for it to end! Sarah had a great idea, to buy some special art supplies for Iliya to take and share with his teacher when he went back to school. So when I picked him up yesterday, he had several neat things to show me.
Last night, Nathan and Iliya were talking about the first day of school. Let me pause for a moment to say that I tend to be a fairly “matter of fact” parent with regard to some things. For me, the whole “going back to school” thing was pretty simple – Iliya would just be picking up where he left off. He’d be back in his old routine, and back with his friends…he knew what to expect out of each day (we had talked about the school day/routine), so it didn’t occur to me that he would be anything but mostly fine about transitioning back to our regular routine. I knew he would be nervous, and I knew that he may cry, but I also knew that Iliya would really be fine, once we got going. On the other hand, Nathan tends to be the more “empathetic” parent, when it comes to Iliya feeling nervous about things, because Nathan can vividly remember feeling anxious or nervous about changes (like the beginning of a new school year) he went through as a child. He reminded me not to brush Iliya’s nervousness aside with platitudes like, “oh, you’ll be okay” or, “but you like school!”
Have I ever mentioned what a good husband & father he is?
So, per our normal routine, I got up early this morning and got ready before I planned to wake Iliya. In between drying my hair and putting my makeup on, I went to the back door to let the dog out…on my way back to my bathroom, I got distracted by the thought of breakfast. So I stopped in the kitchen and pulled out some eggs and decided I would scramble up enough for the rest of the week (it’s really easy to scramble a bunch at once, and then just reheat them every morning – I’m a firm believer in having a good breakfast, and this is the most efficient way I know to ensure that on our busy mornings!). As I was standing in the door of the fridge, thinking about what I needed to do, I realized I wasn’t the only one in the room. I looked behind me, and there was a little boy with tousled hair and big hazel eyes looking up at me. His knuckle was in his mouth, as is prone to happen when he’s feeling sleepy, sad, or nervous. I cheerfully said, “Good morning!” and tears came to his eyes as he said, “I don’t want to go to school this morning.”
I was in a hurry to get his eggs made, and to get my makeup & clothes on, and to make it to work on time. It would’ve been very easy for me to say, “Oh, buddy. You’ll be okay. Once you get there, you’ll remember how much you love school.” But Nathan’s words came to me…and I was taken back to 3 years ago, sitting in the floor of the baby home, with this same precious child in my lap. In an instant, I realized that eggs and makeup and getting to work on time are nothing compared to how much this child just needs to be loved and understood. So I put the eggs down and sat down on the kitchen floor and drew Iliya into my arms. As he snuggled into my arms, we talked about school – about how it’s okay to be nervous, and who all we thought he would see today. We sat like that for a good 5 minutes, just mother and child (and of course 2 cats and a dog), and I realized that this is his last year before he goes to Big School next year…I realized how quickly time passes, and how lucky I am to have a child who will let me comfort him in times of nervousness. That’s not something that a parent of PI child takes for granted!
And his day? He ended up being okay, and we made it to school…he took his art supplies in and proudly showed his teacher, and didn’t cry when I left.
And when I came to pick him up this afternoon?
As predicted, he didn’t want to leave! The picture is of Iliya and his friend, S, creating a dinosaur (can’t you tell?!)
But I still can’t believe that this is his last year before going to Kindergarten! Let me just not think about that for now, and be happy in the present. :)
Nathan -What an absolutely wonderful Mommy our little boy has. A Mommy to love and hold him and reassure him that everything will be okay (just like our Mommies did for us).
We got a call from the adoption agency this afternoon…the birthfamily didn’t choose any of the profiles presented to them…which means, since we were one of the profiles presented, we didn’t get chosen. I know this seems a little disappointing, but we really are fine with their decision: 1) this process (while it seems to be, sometimes) is not all about us. Birthparents have to make the best, informed decision about the family that will raise their child… and 2) We knew we would be fine either way: happy if we were chosen because, well, we’d have a baby! But content if we weren’t chosen because there were several factors (the unusually high placement fee is not the least of which) that made the whole prospect of completing this particular adoption a little daunting. Of course, we would’ve made it & celebrated if things had worked out, but as it stands, we are okay.
In other news:
Please don’t forget about The Great Big Giveaway!! While our most recent potential situation didn’t work out, we definitely feel like we’ve gotten an education in just how quickly this process could go! So, we want to make sure we have our adoption fund ready for when we do receive the call that will change our life forever. As for this particular giveaway, we’ve got 4 more days until it closes, and there are some great opportunities to enter some really awesome drawings. I’m hoping to feature some of the items over the next couple days, so stay tuned!! And please, pass the word along…either on your blog, through email, facebook, twitter, or whatever avenue you have available to you! We are still hovering at almost 40% of our goal, and it would be SO awesome to keep inching (or leaping?!) higher toward our goal!
Finally, here’s a cute video I’ve been meaning to post. In fact, I’ve been meaning to post more Summer Updates, but guess who’s been too busy to post updates about just how busy our summer has been?! Yes, that would be me! This is also an “Iliya fix,” and it was taken over the 4th of July weekend…we were celebrating the holiday with some friends at an Air Force Base, and Iliya decided he wanted to enter the sack race. Too bad we can’t all be this cute while cheating…! :)
(Just in case the player isn’t working, click here)
I love your attitude about the adoption. I think you all are a lot like Frank and I in the sense that things will happen when they are supposed to… there’s no point in rushing things even if we’re excited and wish we could! :)
August 4, 2010 - 2:24 pm
Candice-That video is too cute! He was just making it work, so it’s not REALLY cheating! :)
August 4, 2010 - 2:24 pm
Candice-That video is too cute! And I don’t think it’s cheating, it’s just making it work the best way you can! :)
…I have nothing to report. And now, I guess we’re temporarily back in the Can’t Wait for Monday frame of mind, since we know that news will not come on the weekend. I know these things take time, and it’s better for the birthfamily to take their time and make sure they’re choosing the right family for their baby.
As I mentioned in a previous post, we’ll be absolutely fine, either way…but the not knowing is pretty difficult!
So for now, that’s all the not-much-of-anything I have. Please remember the The Great Big Giveaway! We’re 1 week down and have raised almost 40% of our goal! Thanks to all who have participated…and please keep passing the word along! I’d love to see us reach our goal by next Friday!
Debbie B-Praying for you both as you wait to hear. Not to be negative but the second time is a lot easier, at least it was for us. Second time being shown that is.
And not to ruin your weekend with stress, but you could hear anytime really. If she calls them, they’ll call you. We got the call after hours on a week night. :-)
I wanted to give a quick update on what’s happening around these parts.
First, The Great Big Giveaway has gotten off to an AWESOME start! I am SO humbled by and appreciative to all who have donated, prayed, and helped spread the word! We have raised just over 25% of our goal for this Giveaway! I’ve had a few people ask when the Giveaway will end, and I’m so glad y’all have asked, because I didn’t realize that I had only put the “end date” in just one measly location. The funny thing is that I kept having to refer to it, to remember, myself! And I STILL didn’t realize it was only in one place! Guess that just goes to show how crazy I am, these days. :) So, it will end at 11:59 p.m. on August 6th.
As for the adoption situation…not much is happening, so far, actually. There’s something to be said for having to just sit tight and wait. Sometimes, I think that only adoptive parents understand the true nature of the “waiting” that we endure, but then I remember that we ALL experience excruciating waits of some sort or another through the course of life. Whether it’s waiting to hear back from a job interview…waiting for your spouse to come home from a deployment…waiting for your child to arrive…waiting for your wedding day to finally get here! We all wait (or have waited) for something, so I know that everyone can understand, on some level, what the wait of an adoptive parent is like. The thing about the wait with our current particular situation is that it came up SO quickly, that I think we are still sort of “catching up” on our reaction to even knowing that we’re in the whole waiting phase. So, we feel very much at peace right now.
I also heard that the birthfamily might not have looked at profiles on Monday, as I originally thought, but that they might actually be looking at them sometime today…and I know things change with people’s schedules. So, we’re just sitting tight, and waiting patiently. Knowing that the absolutely BEST thing will happen in this situation.
Now, I must get out of the house & head to work, but I wanted to leave you with one quick story. Because I KNOW you’re probably needing an Iliya fix.
A few weeks ago, we went on our annual beach trip with Nathan’s family. I had to get back to work about halfway through the vacation, so we decided to let Iliya finish out the vacation, and then let Nathan’s folks deliver him back home, safely, on their way back home. Anyway, as a sidenote, Iliya has developed a fascination with “bad guys.” Nathan and I aren’t big TV watchers; therefore, by association, Iliya is not a big TV watcher. We’ve I’ve been adamant about limiting his movie time to happy-themed movies, but a few other movies have slipped in – you know, Wizard of Oz, and some Disney movies that have villains. For the most part, I’m okay with this, especially since he’s handled them well enough. His standard question, as of late, before watching a movie is whether said movie has a “bad guy” in it. If he learns that, yes, it does…then he settles in to take in the action. If not, then he’ll still watch it, but isn’t as “jazzed” about it. Given my lack of enthusiasm for action movies, and my abhorrence for scary/horror movies, I’ve decided that Nathan probably has a good “scary/action movie buddy” sometime, well down the road. I can only hope that our next child will share my affinity for romantic comedies. :)
But I digress.
Anyway, the night before I had to get back to work, everyone (but me – remember, I don’t like movies with scary villains in them – ha ha) was watching The Mummy(Part 3?) as I was putting Iliya down for bed. He had heard us talking about the movie and was DYING to stay up and watch (as he put it) the “Scary Mummies Movie,” but of course, I wouldn’t let him. As I was laying him down, our conversation turned to the next day, when it was time for him to stay by himself with Nana and Papa:
Iliya: but Mama, I don’t want you to leave.
Me: I know, but it’s only for a couple of days
Iliya: But, I need a Mama to take care of me, and if you’re not here, who will take care of me?
Me: (with my heart melting just a little bit) Well, first, you know that I’m always your mama…and that I’m always here for you. And that I will always come back to you, and you will come back to me. And you can remember that Nana is Daddy’s mama, and she knows how to do “mama” things! (sidenote, these were tired protests, and I knew he would love to finish out the vacation at the beach. if he had truly protested, I wouldn’t have left him)
Iliya: Oh, yeah, that’s right. Well, I still don’t want you to go.
Me: I know, and I really wish I could stay! But you know what? (pulling out the ace in my sleeve) I’d be willing to bet that Nana & Papa will probably let you eat food that I don’t normally let you eat!
Iliya: (with a certain gleam in his eyes, pulling out his OWN ace) Yeah. and I BET they’ll let me watch the Scary Mummies Movie, too!!
Of course, they didn’t. But I’m now the mom of a master negotiator. Life is definitely getting more interesting by the day!!
natalie @ our old southern house-hi!
just wanted to let you know i blogged about y’all on my site today. i’m an adoptee myself and while the “only” waiting i’ve had to for my child was trying to conceive for 13 months and for the second one we’ve been trying for 16 months…what a long, hard wait! my parents had to wait SIX YEARS before they were able to adopt me…that puts my little waits in perspective, you know?
anyway, just wanted to tell you that i’m so happy for y’all and praying for you!
July 29, 2010 - 11:02 pm
Melissa -Thank you, Natalie!! It means so much to me that so many people are taking on our cause and helping us spread the word. By the way, I LOVE your house. Wow!!
If you missed it, we’ve had a little activity on our 2nd adoption process! As a result of some of this activity, we’ve had a sense of urgency come over us, so…
I’m really excited about announcing the official start of our second Great Big Giveaway!! I created a separate page for the giveaway… and I really want to get the word out! The giveaway started Friday, July 23rd and will close at midnight on Friday, August 6th……and included in the random drawings will be opportunities for some really awesome items:
* Nikon D5000 DSLR camera & Photography Crash Course DVD
* University of Alabama National Championship framed print & bonus mousepad
* 5 items from the Happy Family Etsy store
* Scentsy package
* Sweets by KP
* Heirloom Baby Bonnet & Bloomers
* Thirty-One Hard Case Wallet
* Custom Handmade Tutu
The first 15 people to donate will receive DOUBLE entries!
I would love for you to check it out, and pass the word along to your family & friends!!
Celeste Peters -You designed this site? It’s fabulous!
July 28, 2010 - 2:08 pm
Candice Gaines-So excited to find your site! I just happily made a donation and posted links on my Facebook and my personal blog! I wish you guys the best of luck!
July 28, 2010 - 11:24 pm
Melissa -Celeste – yes & no. I designed the header, but the layout is a template made by ProPhotoBlogs. I love them & if you want more info on these templates, just let me know!
Candice, thanks so much!! I’ve got your entries all down! :)
For the past month, when people have asked for an update on our current adoption process, we haven’t been able to give them much information. In fact, we knew we were waiting for one of our background clearances to come back…so my standard response has been that we’re “waiting to start waiting.” Sounds silly, but in the adoption world, that’s just the name of the game. Waiting.
We’ve kept ourselves (VERY) busy this summer…We’ve traveled a good deal – to visit family and for work, I’ve finally put the finishing touches on our second giveaway, and we’ve been gathering donations for a yard sale that is happening this weekend. (I use the term “we’ve” VERY loosely here. Nathan and I have stayed relatively out of the way, while folks have donated yardsale items left & right, and while my sister & brother-in-law, in effect, gave up their home this week, to be run over by yard sale donations, and while my brother has worked his hiney off organizing everything into a miniature second-hand department store to be set up on my sister’s lawn on Saturday, and while friends, family, and our church youth group have sorted and priced almost everything. So “we’ve” not done much, except clean out our closets and provide a cause to develop such a big event. And I don’t really know that we can ever adequately express our appreciation to everyone for their help…and those who will come by and take these things off our hands for a good cause. But we are eternally grateful. But…as usual…I digress)
Anyway, we’ve been busy this summer, and honestly, haven’t had much time to think too much about our “waiting to start waiting.”
So, imagine my surprise, yesterday, when a social worker from our agency called to check in with me…to see if we were still planning to come to a class in September……..and after asking that question, said, “well, that’s not really the main reason I’m calling. The main reason is that…well, we have a sort of situation that I want to run by you.”
And, in the space of about 30 seconds, I’m informed that we have not been “waiting to start waiting”…nope, we’ve actually been WAITING. For about 3 weeks, now.
I’m not going to give public details about this situation, but as a general overview: it’s actually located in another state…and it does involve a young couple who is desiring to place their unborn child in the perfect family. So far, they’ve reviewed profiles in their state and haven’t felt they’ve come up with the perfect family (I know, no family is perfect…but I can only imagine the desire of a birthmother to get this decision just. right.). So they’ve requested profiles from other agencies, and ours is one of them.
As the social worker is filling me in on this situation, the fact that we’re not just “waiting to start waiting” anymore is slowly starting to sink in. And then she says, “the baby is due in a couple weeks, and they’re viewing profiles on Monday. So, if you’re interested in having your profile shown, then we need it by tomorrow morning.” Sccreeeeaaaaach (as my brain automatically halted to process this new information) A couple weeks? ………T-t-t-tomorrow M-m-m-m-morning?
Guess who hasn’t had time to put together a nice, pretty, comprehensive profile. Oh right. That would be me. And guess who has been operating on the “waiting to start waiting” premise, and who has been putting money in savings, but who has not been aggressively finalizing fundraising efforts. Oh right. That would be us.
Now, I know that these birthparents are simply viewing profiles…and that our profile isn’t guaranteed to be chosen. And really, we are okay with that. But let’s just think for a second. If it were to happen. If we were chosen. The fees end up being considerably more than they would be, if our profile were chosen within the state of Alabama. So we’re feeling a bit of urgency to work on some fundraising efforts. You know, just in case.
So back to my conversation with the social worker. She said, “this sounds funny, but don’t rush. I mean, I need your profile by in the morning…but just let me know what you think, after you’ve talked with Nathan.”
I immediately got in touch with Nathan, who almost immediately said, “let’s go for it!” And of course, we backed up a little bit and prayed about it…we talked to a few family and friends…and in the end, decided that I would finish gathering our profile, and submit it to be reviewed. It’s hard to know, sometimes, when you’re stepping out on faith, and when you’re just making a dumb decision. But we know that God can work in many powerful ways.
Sure, we might not be chosen. And sure, if we are, there could be some roadblocks. But we have faith that we’re not up against anything that we can’t overcome. And you know, you just never really know when and where (and how!) God will really show Himself.
So, we are no longer “waiting to start waiting.” We are officially waiting! AND, on Monday, our profile will be shown for the very first time. Pinch me, so I know this is not just a dream!
Well, then, what about that profile? I was up with a friend until about 2 a.m. working on it. Fortunately for me, she has some mad speed-scrapbooking skills…and could be a small voice of organization in my otherwise jumbled up brain. I’m that photographer that has a million pictures of my child, but most of them are either in photo frames or filed nicely away on my external hard drive. After I put Iliya down for bed, I started worrying about how I was going to get pictures printed and ready for scrapbooking…I sat at the computer for an hour, with my thoughts going in circles, looking through photos I wanted to use, when I finally decided we just didn’t have time for that (afterall, at 10:30 p.m., who is going to be able to print these pictures, anyway?!). So in a moment of clarity, I announced that we were going to raid the photo frames in the house…I could always have more printed, right?! So that’s precisely what we did. And I mentioned her speed-scrapbooking? That was priceless. After about 3 hours of sleep, I woke up extra early this morning, to write this (supposed to be) quick post and then run to the store and print the last 3 or 4 pictures I didn’t already have hard copies of…I will put them in their place within the profile, and on my way to work, I will drop this off to be scanned and sent to our agency.
So I guess I will close this post – not eloquently, but with a plea for prayers. I am officially starting our Great Big Giveaway #2 (go ahead & check it out, the big announcement is coming probably this evening), and we are hopeful that it will do even better than the first giveaway! And…we know that this situation may just be a “prep” for something else…who knows?…and we are fine with that! But it has definitely created a sense of urgency for us. And if you will keep praying for everyone involved…for us & our finances, for the birthparents to make the best decision, for the baby, that it is healthy and will end up in the very best place possible.
Let the waiting commence! Uh…about three weeks ago! :)
Tori -What exciting news Melissa. We will be praying for you guys and I really hope the yard sale goes well this weekend. I will have to check into the next big giveaway too. I hope we are able to see you guys again soon!!!
July 23, 2010 - 1:36 pm
Jennifer-Mellisa, I am beyond thrilled for you all. My prayers are with you as you travel on this wonderful, exciting, surprising and blessed journey!!!
July 23, 2010 - 5:35 pm
Kay B -WoW! What an exciting turn of events! Glad you had a mad-scrapper close at hand to help you get your profile beautifully organized. Praying for God’s covering over the current situation and your “waiting”!
July 23, 2010 - 6:18 pm
Kim G.-Melissa,
I know we’ve only met briefly, but reading your blog has given me an even deeper appreciation for you, Nathan and your sweet little guy. I will be praying come Monday that the Lord’s will is done in this situation–and that the process is smooth and joy-filled!
You are truly a beautiful family
July 23, 2010 - 11:14 pm
Debbie B-OMG! That’s amazing. I so remember the first time we knew we were going to be shown. We waited so long to find out what she had decided. Of course if she’s due so soon she’ll probably make a decision very quickly. I’ll be praying for the sale this weekend and all of that part of it to come together quickly. And I’ll be praying for you both as you wait to hear this expectant mother’s decision.
July 26, 2010 - 8:09 am
Shannon -Mel, What exciting news!! I will pray for the best possible situation for you all. Leaving it in God’s hands is the best place for it to be. Miss ya’ll and love ya!
July 26, 2010 - 8:15 am
ChristenL-That’s great!! :) I can’t wait to hear how it all comes together.
July 28, 2010 - 6:23 am
Niki-This reminds me so much of our situation with little L that I got goose bumps reading it. We went from first notice, to holding our new son in SEVEN weeks. Thoughts and prayers are with you guys!
As you saw in my last couple posts, my boy is growing up. Quickly, too! I know I’ve said this before, but I can remember when, back in the day, I occasionally felt a little twinge of sadness that we didn’t have Iliya as a small baby. But from my current vantage point, I can’t believe just how MUCH a baby he was, when we brought him home! With his little short legs and chubby cheeks and diapers and pudgy tummy and babbling English and restless nights.
And now, he has grown taller…gone is the pudgy tummy. Diapers are in our very distant past. He still has cute cheeks, but they’re not nearly as chubby as they once were. He no longer babbles, unless he’s just being goofy, and for the most part, he sleeps soundly through the night. Even the few times I’ve realized he’s awakened during the night, he has gotten up by himself, used the potty, and climbed back in his bed, all by himself.
A huge part of me is so thankful that he’s a fairly independent creature, while an equally huge part of me wishes he still needed me to change his diapers and to feed him his oatmeal in the morning.
And then there’s another huge part of me that loves (almost) every minute of having a 4-year old. I can (most of the time) reason with him, he can reason with me, he is hilarious (even if inappropriately so, sometimes), and…well…this is proving to be an enjoyable age. I figure it’s been much too long since I’ve given you a peek into some of the things heard around our house…so here is a little recap of our 4-year-old experience, thus far:
Iliya: Hey mama. Did you know that Gracie (the dog) is from Russia?
Me: No, I didn’t know that!
Iliya: Yes. She’s from Alabama, Russia. But she was born in Tennessee, California. Yes, that’s right.
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This past Monday was my birthday. The neat thing about having a child who is cognizant of birthdays is that I get to be like a kid again, and await my birthday with baited breath! In fact, we celebrated for almost a week, leading up to my birthday. And on many occasions, I heard, “Hey mama. Since it’s almost your special day, do you think we could have a special treat tonight? Like….maybe some candy.” -or- “Hey mama, I’ve got an idea! Tomorrow is your special day! So maybe we should do something special. Like go to the store and get some ice cream.” -or- insert doing anything out of the ordinary under the guise of celebrating my upcoming special day. Despite the attempted manipulation(s) – or maybe because of them – I really enjoyed turning thirty-something this year! :)
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Iliya and I were at T.aco B.ell the other evening, grabbing a bite before running to the grocery store. One of our friends from church walked in to pick up some takeout food for his family’s dinner, and we ended up chatting for a few minutes. After he left, Iliya asked incredulously, “How did they know we were here?!” To which I replied, “I don’t know, buddy. Maybe they saw our car?” and Iliya said, “but HOW did they know we were here?!?” And again, I replied, “Well, our car is parked out front.” With an exasperated sigh, Iliya said, “But mama. That’s not the question. The question IS: How. did. they. know. we. were. here?”
*sigh* I can’t imagine who, around our house, has modeled perfect exasperation for this child to learn!
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Also on the same night:
Iliya: Hey, what kind of dessert do they have here?
Me: I don’t know.
Iliya: You can tell me! I don’t want to get any. I just want you to tell me what they have
Me: Well, I guess all they have are cinn.astix.
Iliya: Well, I would like some, but I know we are going to P.ublix, and I really would rather have a cookie. And I know that if I whine for dessert here, then you won’t let me have a cookie at P.ublix. So, I’m not going to whine, and when we get to P.ublix, we can get a cookie. Does that sound like a good idea?
(fabulous, buddy. fabulous. by the way, who taught you those mad negotiation skills?)
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Iliya: Mama, do you know who I love so much?
Me: Ummmmm…me! :)
Iliya: No. Well, I mean yes. But someone else, too. It’s someone who’s name starts with a C.
Me: Hmmmmmmmm……..
Iliya: A “C”, like “SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS”
Me: Oh, well…Sarah?
Iliya: Good job mama! You are RIGHT!! Do you know who else I love?
Me: No idea.
Iliya: Here, I’ll give you a hint. It starts with a (note: sound this out) “BRK”
Me: Hmmmm, let’s see. Brooks?
Iliya: Mama, RIGHT!! How’d you get to be so smart?!
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Iliya was singing in his bedroom the other night, and unbeknownst to him, I was listening. He was singing Three Blind Mice, and it went like this:
Three Blind Mouse
Three Blind Mouse
Three Blind Mouse
Three Blind Mouse
The farmer cut off their tails with a carving knife!
I can’t remember the rest of the words to the song!
Three Blind Mouse
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And there are many more great moments around our house, but I will end with this one…a moment in the car:
On a recent trip: Iliya, about 15 minutes into the 2-hour trip, looked up from his movie playing in the backseat, and says, “mama, I know you said not to ask this again, but I really really NEED to know: are we almost there?”
Today is the anniversary of our court date & the day we picked Iliya up from the baby home. I honestly can’t believe that it has been three years. For so long, it seemed like we would never finish our adoption…and here we are, and all the paperwork and excruciating waiting are but fond memories.
Sis -I did rewind and it brought back good memories – oh, so sweet – it’s hard to believe 3 years have passed!
sis
July 21, 2010 - 7:32 am
Debbie B-It’s getting harder and harder to remember the wait.
Happy 3 years!
July 22, 2010 - 7:28 pm
Nancy Harris -I love reading all the things he says to you.
The CD player I loved it then and now
July 27, 2010 - 10:18 pm
Carolyn -We do a little celebration on the day we recieved our children too. That day is extra special to adopting parents I think. I can’t believe it’s been that long. Loved going back in time. I wish I could have something for my children to go back to now that they are older. They would have loved to see these things and know how much they are loved. We are so very thankful God chose us to raise his children and our children chose us to love back. Life is great when we trust in God.
by Melissa
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